Matthew 10:34-42 – A Sword, the Family, and the Reward, Part 1

As we come to the end of Jesus’s instructions to his disciples before they head out on their own, I would like to say that I haven’t been very surprised by what Jesus has said. He told them some of the towns and homes to which they go will accept them and some won’t. He told them some wolves would seek to harm them but they should not be afraid since the Spirit will be guiding and protecting them. This much seems quite consistent with the Jesus we have all come to know and love. But this week, Jesus drops a real zinger right off the bat. He said,

34 “Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword.

Matthew 10:34

I want to know where Jesus the meek and mild has gone? Previously, he instructed his disciples to shake their dusty shoes at those who reject the message of the kingdom but not to incite riotous behavior. But now, he says he has come to bring a sword and I’m not sure how that fits with my picture of meek and mild Jesus.

The kingdom’s message is a message of peace, love, and acceptance. Even atheists will tell you Jesus was a good guy who preached love. But such a perception of Jesus seems to ignore the fact that his kingdom message is one of repentance and submission. Even Jesus’s first public words proclaim this when he said, “Blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom of heaven” (Matt. 5:3). Most people assume Jesus is blessing those who have poor self-esteem, are weak-willed, or run down by life’s trials, but that is not the case. The first beatitude blesses those who are poor in spirit because they understand they are sinners with a depraved soul and they have no hope of redemption or salvation. And then, from this starting point of repentance, the beatitudes progress through mercy, purity, and peace before the repentant one finally inherits the kingdom of heaven. But this path begins with acknowledging that one is a sinner without the power to correct their own problems. It is this message that is the starting point for kingdom citizens. And it is this starting point that brings a sword.

Many who read this blog know I have had some fairly serious issues in the past few years. As a result, I’ve been in numerous counseling situations, some Biblically based and some not. With the non-biblical counselors, I’ve found one constant underlying foundation and that is best summed up by the phrase, “I’m not a bad person, I just made a bad decision.” To be honest, I’d love to believe that. But, even though their good and well-meaning counseling helps me recognize triggers for bad behavior, how to avoid high-risk situations, and how to develop an escape plan from tempting situations, it’s not completely accurate. The root problem is not that I made a bad decision, though I did, the root problem is that I am a corrupted version of God’s creation and I need to be repaired by my creator.

I’ve heard a story about a brief response G. K. Chesterton wrote to the New York Times following its publication of an article titled, “What’s wrong with the world today?” Chesterton wrote,

Dear sir,
I am.
Yours, G. K. Chesterton.

Whether this letter was actually written or not is mostly irrelevant to the fact that Chesterton hit the nail on the head. We humans are flawed, capable of many horrible things, and the problem with the world today. But, until we realize and accept that truth we will never be able to accept the rest of Jesus’s kingdom teaching. And I suspect it is this about which Jesus was warning the disciples. A sword comes between those who see humanity as fallen and those who see humanity as good people who made bad decisions. Jesus taught others to turn the other cheek when being persecuted, but when it comes to accepting the fallen state of humanity, Jesus seems to yield no ground. The sword of truth that comes from his words cleaves humanity into two groups: those who accept the fallen state of man as the truth of existence, and those who don’t.

Jesus details the pervasive nature of his sword when he said,

35 For I have come to set a man against his father,
and a daughter against her mother,
and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law.
36 And a person’s enemies will be those of his own household.

Matthew 10:35-36

Family, as seen throughout the Gospels, does not seem to hold the same level of importance for Jesus as it seems to hold for many Christians today. Family is important, that is true, but the more important allegiance is the connection we have to those who realize the truth of our situation: other kingdom citizens. But such a connection is not formed through a genetic link of similar DNA, it is formed by allegiance and submission to the teachings of Jesus and the will of the Father. The sword of Jesus’s words cleaves genetic links and forms spiritual families. Ideally, both links should remain strong, but we are fooling ourselves if we believe the stronger of the two is the genetic connection.

Fellow believers are our true family with whom we will spend eternity. Genetic bonds, as strong as they might appear to be, will not survive death unless they are strengthened with the spiritual bonds of the kingdom. The message of the kingdom is for everyone, genetic family included, but, as Jesus has already said, if a town or house does not accept the message we must shake the dust off of our shoes and move on to those who will. We must be careful to not spend our time in a field not willing to be harvested. This does not mean we cease praying for those fields — the town, the house, the family members who have rejected the gospel — but we should move on to a field ripe for harvest all the while still praying that the hardened fields will someday themselves become ripe and ready for a harvest.

These are hard words, I realize that. But Jesus doesn’t give the disciples the sword of his word for the sole purpose of chopping up family relationships. The sword of Jesus’s word cleaves those who believe from those who don’t, regardless of genetics. But if a genetic family also has true spiritual bonds, Jesus still wants it to be clear which bond is the true bond. He said,

37 Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me,
and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.

Matthew 10:37

Our connection to Jesus demands our primary allegiance, and it provides guardrails for our family connections. On the one side of the road, we find a guardrail in the form of the first commandment which says, “You shall have no other gods before me” (Deut. 5:7); our whole life should not revolve around our children or parents. And on the other side of the road, we find another guardrail in the form of the fifth of the Ten Commandments which says, “Honor your father and your mother” (Deut. 5:16); we should not dismiss, hate, or treat our parents spitefully. Our love for others, and for family, only exists because he first loved us (I John 4:19). The true love we have for others is the overflow of the love Jesus has poured out upon us. But if we love others more than we love Jesus, we short-circuit our relationships and will have no true love to give because have not received true love from God.

All this being said, we must realize that family is still important. In fact, Paul writes, “But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever” (I Tim. 4:8). We are to care for our family members, often in such ways that require us to put our own lives on hold. This difficult task requires that we sacrifice many of our own longings as we learn to love others because Jesus first loved us. It is this sort of self-sacrifice to which Jesus refers when he said,

38 And whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me.

Matthew 10:38

If you are like me you have heard the phrase “carrying my cross” used to mean all sorts of things such as poverty, illnesses, social standing, reputation, goiter…nearly everything. But none of those seem to be what Jesus is saying. The cross we are to carry so as to be worthy of him is that we sacrifice our own longings and desires for the sake of others because Jesus did so for us. But, if we are unwilling to sacrifice ourselves for him and others then we are unworthy to be called his disciples. Jesus said, “Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you” (John 15:13-14). To take up our cross is to lay down our lives for our friends: both Jesus, who calls us friends, and others who also do what Jesus commanded of them. Taking up our cross is self-sacrifice in the same way that Jesus sacrificed his will to the will of his Father in heaven, even to the point of dying on the cross for those friends of his who follow his commandments. Jesus clarifies this point of self-sacrifice when he says these next words.

39 Whoever finds his life will lose it,
and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.

Matthew 10:39

If we seek to make a name for ourselves, establish who we are, and long to be self-sufficient and grand in the eyes of the world, then we will lose the only true life we can ever have. But, if we choose the path of self-sacrifice, take up our cross and die for our friends, and love Jesus more than others and others more than ourselves, then we will find the only true life worth living. I realize this seems counter-intuitive, but if we seek only such things that gratify our own sense of well-being we will find that we have lost everything.

It was in a junior high health class when I was first taught Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. His hierarchy is often illustrated as a pyramid where the base level is our physiological needs, the next level is our safety needs, then love needs, and esteem needs. The pinnacle of the pyramid — the very definition of what it means to be human — is known as self-actualization or that point at which we reach our full potential. I believe this model is still taught in both public and private (Christian) schools, and it is taught as though it is a law of nature. But, even though there is some merit in Maslow’s hierarchy, I suggest that the pinnacle of Maslow’s hierarchy contradicts our human nature as created by God and described by the Bible. The writer of Ecclesiastes, after seeking any and everything that might meet his demand at each level of his pyramidal needs, concluded by saying, “The end of the matter; all has been heard. Fear God and keep his commandments for this is the whole duty of man” (Eccl. 12:13). Contrary to Maslow and our modern teaching, self-fulfillment does not complete our lives; fulfillment and completion come only when we love God and sacrifice for others because of God’s great love first poured out upon us.

At this point, it is, I believe, important to remember we are talking about what it looks like for the Father’s kingdom to come and his will to be done on earth as it is in heaven. THIS IS IT. This is the heart of the matter. This is the pinnacle of human existence. In fact, when Jesus responded to the question posed to him about the greatest commandment he said we are to love God with our whole being and we are to love others in the same way that we love ourselves (Matt. 22:34-40). Losing our lives for Jesus’s sake is the only way to find fulfillment; it is the only way for us to become who we were created to be.

Following these words, the apparent pinnacle of Jesus’s instructions, he gives his disciples some last words before sending them off on a drive by themselves. He said,

40 “Whoever receives you receives me,
and whoever receives me receives him who sent me.
41 The one who receives a prophet because he is a prophet will receive a prophet’s reward,
and the one who receives a righteous person because he is a righteous person will receive a righteous person’s reward.
42 And whoever gives one of these little ones even a cup of cold water because he is a disciple, truly, I say to you, he will by no means lose his reward.”

Matthew 10:42

Contrasted with Jesus’s earlier words that those rejecting the disciples would receive worse punishment than Sodom and Gomorrah (Matt. 10:15), these words provide hope, and a hope of the most profound nature. Not only will those receiving the disciples be rewarded in the same manner as both a prophet and a righteous person, not only will they be rewarded for giving a cup of cold water to slake a disciple’s thirst, but those who receive the disciples are ultimately receiving Jesus and the Father. If you think on this for just a moment, you should realize that eternal stakes are wagered every time the message of the kingdom is presented to those in the fields ripe for harvest. Jesus’s kingdom message is not merely a message of morality and reformed behavior, it is a message of eternal destiny.

But these last words of Jesus tell us something else: the messenger is the representative of Jesus and his Father. When the disciples walked into a new town and began to share the gospel of the Kingdom, they were, in actuality, the hands, feet, and voice of Jesus and the Father.

This is often described as being like an ambassador or an emissary sent from a king, and I suppose that is a fairly good analogy. In fact, Paul even calls us “ambassadors for Christ” (II For 5:20), but it seems that Paul and Jesus meant something much more profound than merely being sent on the Father’s behalf. The disciples were taking God’s very words to the fields ripe for harvest and, in a very real sense, they became God’s presence. When we think of an ambassador or an emissary, we recognize that these people are separate from the one who had sent them. But Jesus seems to place more weight on the disciple’s presence than merely being an ambassador.

To understand this, let’s take a quick look at Jesus. When he came to earth he was God’s presence on earth. Of course, he was, and is, God himself, but he was and is also the son of God. As such, he was not just an ambassador, he was the reality of God’s presence and the rightful heir of God’s kingdom. And, even though John 3:16 makes it clear that Jesus was God’s “only begotten son,” Matthew 12:50 makes it clear that anyone who does the will of the Father is Jesus’s brother and sister. We may not be begotten sons of the Father, but we are his adopted sons and daughters. We do not go to the fields ripe for harvest as merely an ambassador, we go as part of God’s holy family here on earth. Receiving the father is accomplished when the listener receives the son. And receiving the son is accomplished when the listener receives the adopted sons and daughters of the Father. The first disciples went, and modern disciples go as brothers and sisters of Jesus; sons and daughters of the Father. And when someone receives us — receives the words of Jesus — they receive a reward. And Jesus tells us this reward is the same reward the Father gives to prophets and righteous people. But what is that reward?

This is not a question for which we need to strain our intellect. God’s reward to any and all who receive him is eternal life (Rom. 6:23). But we often forget what “eternal life” really means. Of course, it means eternal life, but it also means we return to our rightful place in the family of the Father. It means we are reconciled to the Father who walked in the garden in the cool of the day. While many might hope the Father’s reward is riches or fame or sensual fulfillment or some other type of passing pleasure or our best life now, that is not the case. The true reward awaiting us ever since we were kicked out of the garden — the pearl of great price, and the treasure hidden in a field — is a return to the intimate relationship we once had with the infinite God who is the creator, sustainer, and lover of the universe.

Jesus wanted his disciples to know before they drove down the driveway that the Kingdom of Heaven was their rightful inheritance because they were sons of the Father. He wanted them to know they were heading out, not just to glean ripe fields, but they were going to invite lost sons and daughters back into their rightful and intimate relationship with the Father. And so, when Jesus spoke these last words, he stepped back from the car and waved at the disciples as they headed down the driveway and turned out onto the street. I imagine, in this picture, Jesus sitting down and waiting at the front door of his Father’s house for the soon return of the disciples. But he does not wait because he worries about them. No, Jesus waits with anticipation to see the new brothers and sisters they found while driving around — brothers and sisters for whom he will take great joy in introducing to the Father.

2 comments

  1. Z

    Dave,
    I came to the realization that I had idolized my marriage and family and family of origin, as generations before me have and do today . I’m brought to a place of repentance. Your blog was shared with me and it has put so much into proper alignment with Jesus. THANK YOU ! Hope returned .
    In addition , I couldn’t help but notice how emphasized the intimacy with Jesus and the relationships between one another as believers was brought forth. Intimacy and relationship with the Father that allows intimacy and relationship with one another will reflect Jesus to a world and bring in the harvest , at a cost that will bring great reward . So much here to Re read and ponder .

    Timely and true , thank you again

  2. L

    Such a good post. You lead us through the progression of Jesus’ words so well here. Really appreciate the emphasis on “kingdom family” and what that means. Right before reading this, I received a voice message from a friend who was talking about the pain and hurt experienced by her family that has led to a separation but how her brothers and sisters in Christ who have encouraged her with the truth have been her family. I sent her an excerpt from this post as an affirmation.

    As I’m writing, I’m reminded of the thief on the cross who did in fact “receive Jesus and His words” and in turn received the reward: eternal life. I keep encountering non-believers who are “receiving” more than what I sometimes see the Church receiving right now. The harvest is ripe.

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